Monday, June 19, 2006

My warrant

I want all of you to keep in mind, I was only eighteen...

I used to have a boyfriend Lowell, who was very charismatic and handsome (not as handsome as my man now. Oh, how I love that man of mine. That's another story). Any way, Lowell had a group of friends that would follow him everywhere he went (if they could find him). He came over to my house on his motorcycle, and of course, eventually his clan followed. All were drunk and feelin' a little rowdy. (I wasn't). Yeah! What fun.

There were 8 motorcycles parked in my front yard. Suddenly, a fight breaks out. It is Lowell's brother and one of his buddies. Oh how they loved to fight when they were drunk. Weeee. How stupid was I when I was younger...

The neighbors called the police. I guess when the cops heard there were 8 bikers, they came in full force. There were 5 cop cars and then came another. The last cop get out of his car in full riot gear. He had his helmut on and his shotgun in his hand. My little dog Cocoa, half Chihuahua and half rat terrier was petrified. She started barking at him. The cop points his gun at my baby and said, "You had better shut that dog up, or I'll shoot it". (The fucktard! Great word!) So I respond, " You better ya pussy or she may bike your leg off!"

That son of a bitch grabbed me, swung me around on to the hood of his car head first and handcuffed me!!! I about pooped my panties. I had never really been in trouble before and was totally caught off guard. Lowell pipes in and yells not to arrest his girlfriend and he was cuffed too.

We went to jail together. Oh, how romantical. We were in the holding cage together smooching and laughing, having a good time. The clerks were asking us our names, ages, and so on and so forth. They asked, "Okay, the big question. Are you married?" Hell no or we would be fightin' instead of smoochin'. My mom came and bailed both of us out. She didn't mind at all. She loved Lowell. (Hmmm, how messed up is that?)

I was arrested for obstruction of justice. Whatever... There was a court date and a $50 fine attached. Whoops! I missed it. Later, of course they caught up with me.

Friday, June 02, 2006

The guy got shot! It was like a movie.

In my younger days....On one of my many adventures with one of my best friends Chris.....

We were out and gettin' drunk for about the third day in a row, we saw one of Chris's friends at the bar (Tony). We were havin' a great time dancin', singin', and jokin'. Tony, felt like a third wheel because Chris my friend, is a dude. Tony wanted to see if one of his old girl friends was home.

It was about one in the morning and we pulled up to this chick's apartment in Tony's '55 Chevy convertable (bad ass car!). Chris and I were waiting in the car when we heard a loud pop. Chris being my protective man friend yells, "Get down!" He grabs my head and shoves it down towards the floor of the car.

Suddenly Tony comes staggering from behind the apartment house (ya know, kinda like Fred Sanford during a fake heart attack). He says, very dramatically, "I've been shot!" He is holding the back of his neck to stop the blood where he had been shot. Chris said very dramatically, "Get in the car and I'll drive ya to the hospital!" Tony said, "Hell no, nobody's drivin' my car!" Yes, he did say that! Thank god, the hospital was only about four blocks away and with the exception of Tony's gunshot wound, we arrived safely.

Finally, Chris did drive Tony's car away because he had warrants and would not go in. So, I go in at Tony's side. He's bleeding and the medical staff rushes out and gets him on a gurny and puts in him a room to await a doctor. In the mean time, the cops come into the room to interigate. Damn, it turned out I had a waurrent out for my arrest (that's another story) and they drug me away in hand cuffs from Tony's bed.

It turns out Tony's old girlfriend had a new boyfriend. I never saw Tony again, but I knew he survived.

......................Several years later, about 22 years later, my husband was over visiting one of his friends. A man named tony was talking about the time he was shot and a girl named Becky was at his side and was arrested, whatever. Randy, my husband said, "That was my wife", and shot him again! .....Just kiddin'.

It turns out Tony was shot with a shotgun and had buck shot in his neck and still does. However, he is doing fine.